Unavoidable Exasperation

Well, good people, the Fields has shuffled its way into confirmation bias again. How often does anecdotal evidence have to occur before I’m not “just seeing what I want to see?” That I ask you in earnest, as the Devil if I’m just imagining it all. I’m not. I’m not going mad. Situations like this happen before, and it takes years for people to fess up. Gaslighting for fun and profit.

Of course it’s a dead night here in Hooterville. They’re all dead nights, filled with people either too insular to be social or too vile to be acceptable. I, with such copious amounts of opportunity, head to an old tavern of which I’ve been a patron for a long time. How long? So long that I know all the bartenders and they know what I drink.

As I fell off the wagon (a-gain), I stepped outside in the 1º C night to smoke a cigarette. Shortly thereafter two women, of whom I thought were attractive, enter the patio area to chat. Say what you will about proper first impressions, but your physical being is the first thing I see. There needs to be slack cut in this department. We exchanged salutations and I let them converse as they intended. Not so much a minute more two “men” stepped out, loud with liquor.

Normally, this scene is mildly irritating. Bothersome drunk men at a bar is a common occurrence, however what happens next always cuts me to the quick. The one male that looks like he hadn’t missed a meal in his life starts speaking loudly about his exploits with another woman. He obviously thought he was a comedian, as he tried to deliver it as a stand-up routine. His act included his jest with roofies and about this unidentified women’s threat to toss her rag in his face. I will not clean it up, as the raw statement evokes such a visceral reaction out of me. The hardest, and most painful, part was these women aside the would-be Bill Hicks were giggly and twittering as if they had been taken for a spa day.

Now, I’ve heard it all before:

“Nate, you don’t know the context of the relationships.”

“Nate, some people won’t change.”

“Nate, they’re simply a bad apple. Don’t let it spoil the bunch.”

“Nate, you wouldn’t want a woman like that anyway.”

Good gravy, how much context does one need?! If I’m not meeting any women around here giving me the time of day, or choosing a disgusting human like that instead of considering me, what do I have left? Not a thing. Not a thing is the correct answer. Go pound sand, Hooterville, you rotten town in denial.

On a brighter note, I relocated to a bar in a different city and had a conversation with an architectural student from Savannah, GA. He was originally from the area, and was there for the Thanksgiving holiday. We talked about how Savannah was like the human body in civic planning terms, which was a welcome change of pace.

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10 thoughts on “Unavoidable Exasperation

  1. Human beings are complex creatures with fleshed out personalities and minds that reach miles deep in intricate thought patterns. Or so the scientists tell us.
    –JW

  2. Bars full of shitheads are not confined to Hooterville. Don’t despair:)

    • There is no real counter to it around here. With bars closing in the last four years, there are even fewer options than there were before.

      I know there are terrible bars elsewhere, but would it be too much to ask to one that isn’t here? I know. I know. I’m such a demanding person.

  3. kerbey says:

    I’m sorry, Nate. I live in the Live Music Capital of the World, which has thousands of bars, including one where it is always Christmas inside, a grimy one called the Poodle Dog Lounge that just shut down (where octogenarian patrons disregarded the no-smoking ordinance and hid ashtrays in their laps)–a city that necessitated an online list of our 25 douchiest bars. Seriously. At least your bar doesn’t sound douchy. Just crass.

    • As I was mentioning to Roger, there have been a handful of bars that closed in the past few years. This particular bar oscillates clientele by day, time of day, and if there’s a sports game or UFC fight on. It can get that way at times. There are fewer places to go for these wonderful people.

  4. WoodsWoman says:

    “Different bar, in a different city” sounds like it’s got a lot going for it. *smile*

    • You’ve got a point. It’s my only real alternative in the area. It’s a college bar in a college town, and can get overrun by students during peak hours. At least I have the option of reaching it by car, if desired.

  5. I echo Roger. Good people are just hard to find.

    • Even with limited traveling experience, I would agree in certain regards, however that would make it a matter of statistical probability. If they are hard to find everywhere, then there is a mathematical probability they’re nowhere to be found here (sample: small, probability of x: small). One then must understand that the notion isn’t very helpful in that light.

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