Be Careful of What You Ask, WordPress

There has been a recent change to my WordPress experience: the introduction of survey questions. I hate being solicited for surveys. They’re next to the visit from the Latter Day Saints. If I wanted to do something for you, I’d seek you out. I had Intuit, the mega-corporation that delivers us QuickBooks, provide me with a survey so I could talk up the fourth customer service representative I had because she actually got what I needed done. I run an account on a review website because I write about restaurants I feel strongly about (good or bad). Point is: I will make the effort to give you feedback. Otherwise, I’m real busy and need to be left alone.

In the spirit of being impish, I’ve decided to answer any survey question with a very unique answer. It may not be exactly what corporate wants, but at least the employees will get a laugh out of it. I’ve only had two so far, but I swear I will not fail to answer every, single one of their questions!


Q: How could we customize your WordPress site?

A: By giving me designer gnomes to do my bidding!

Q: How do you feel about our themes?

A: First, I look for my glasses, as I can’t see a thing without them. After I’ve effectively knocked and lost them off the nightstand, I proceed to determine that which is in front of me. When patting the snout and fluffy ears, I determine that it is a WordPress theme I’m holding. So, in a roundabout way, I would say “with my hands.”


Maybe we all should show WordPress how imaginative we can be with their questions? After all, this is a place for create writing.

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6 thoughts on “Be Careful of What You Ask, WordPress

  1. I feel sad about clicking enter without writing anything. I’d like to have written them a 10 page essay on why all my posts should be on freshly pressed.

  2. After much deliberation, the Phonyon Staff reported that it felt “queasy” about the themes.

  3. I always do them. I’m honest. Who knows what might happen???

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